Should I Focus on Me?

How many times I could say I have heard the old worn-out phrase you cannot pour from an empty cup. When I know there are plenty of mothers and fathers out there like me continuously pouring from an empty cup. You find the dregs in the bottom of your cup and keep pouring when the children or your spouse needs you. Sometimes you might even just give your whole damn cup away to give something to someone else. Then you might be looking around wondering if maybe you should have to that little bit of me time. But doesn’t that make you a bad parent? Isn’t your life supposed to be focused on them twenty-four seven? There is the guilt already. Focusing on yourself is not a bad thing. It would be if you ignored your children, but you aren’t going to do that. Sometimes locking yourself in a closet for five minutes of peace might stop you from screaming just because someone needed something from you for the eight thousandth time today.

I started going to therapy a little over a month ago and wow has it opened up my eyes to the fact that focusing on you a little bit will actually make you a better parent. Spending a little time to yourself isn’t going to make your kids love you less in fact it might make you a whole lot more fun. You know why? Well, that cup actually has something besides old tea leaves falling out of it. You are now in a better mindset.

However, you don’t just have to apply this to parenting. Some people give so much to their jobs or other members of their families that they still are not leaving anything for themselves. One thing I had to learn is that it is okay to say no to work sometimes. You don’t have to work yourself to death. You can take a day off and decompress.

You don’t have to reinvent the wheel or think it has to be an elaborate thing you do for yourself. Maybe you sit on the couch for 30 minutes and read a book. Catch up on a TV show that you love. Garden for a little while and let the kids play outside. Go for a walk or a run. Pick up and old hobby that you forgot about. Just make a little bit of time to fill that cup up. It is not being selfish.

Comment and tell us what you will do to focus on yourself just a little bit more.

Stay safe,

The Anxious Mom